…..he couldn’t wait to brag about all the money he left behind on Earth’s surface when he got to the Afterlife but, strangely, no one wanted to hear about it there; they all seemed to have more important things on their minds. How can this be, he thought to himself? I amassed a glittery fortune when I was alive and sentient and financially killing it back on Good Old Earth, and now all these ignorant yahoos up here in Nirvana prioritize matters entirely differently and aren’t interested in offering me the credit I so richly deserve for having been a financial assassin down on Earth’s ultra-competitive crust. And the guy’s frustration only grew and swiftly metastasized after that. He was an unrivaled master at gathering and amassing and consolidating and amalgamating and hoarding assets, yet a premium clearly wasn’t placed on those distinct skills at his new place of residence. Rather, generosity and altruism and beneficence seemed to be held in much higher regard, and those were qualities that admittedly had not been his forte as a mortal being. To be blunter than a kid’s plastic knife, he had eternally scoffed at and interpreted the aforesaid qualities as weaknesses and signs of fragility and vulnerability i.e. windows of opportunity while a denizen of Earth, but now? Yes—NOW??? Hmmmmmmm………. Who knows…..maybe he would have to temporarily strategize a little differently in order to gain the upper hand on his unsuspecting dipshit brethren…..
Fred's Soapbox 